Did you see me on TV?

Kickoff returns:
5 for an avg of 21.6 yards. That's over a 20-yard average!

Punt Returns:
2 for a 14.5 yard avg. Hello. That would be leading the league if that were the last game.

Receiving:
2 for 16 yards. Oh, yeah. I can catch, too.

Did y'all see that d-bag Ravens player jawing with me after a kickoff return? Well, then you also saw me stare him down with my steel-blue eyes. I swear he said "Ball-Boy" to me.

OK, so I had to get my toe x-rayed during the game. I'll be honest with you. It was broken. Shattered. While they were getting the x-ray ready, I healed my toe with the power of my mind. X-rays: negative. BOOYAH!

Yes, I called a fair-catch. Well, three. So fucking sue me. But before you do, know that I will counter sue any of you that try to interrupt my ability to make a living. Fuck you, NCAA.

Excellent 2007 debut by J-Bloom. Going to pick up Madden 2008 today. I had better have a 100 rating for my speed and agility god dammit.