I'm on the Hot-Seat?

I reported to training camp today. This is what I find taped to my pillow in my room.

Wide receiver/kick returner Jeremy Bloom

When’s the last time you were excited to see the Eagles return a kick? Probably not since J.R. Reed was the return man, and that was three seasons ago.

If Brian Westbrook or Lito Sheppard stood back there, you just didn’t want them to get hurt.

The Eagles haven’t returned a punt for a touchdown since 2003 (Westbrook, 81 yards vs. San Francisco). They haven’t returned a kickoff for a touchdown since 2001 (Brian Mitchell, 94 yards, at Arizona).

Will Bloom change that?

Umm, yes, I'll change that. Oh, and I'm getting a little pissed that these things are being slipped my way. What's a hot-seat? Is this reporter saying that I have a hot ass? Well, that's true, but this Eagle doesn't fly that way, pal. This reporter gets the gas face.

The Eagles turned down my demand to have my lawyer and agent room with me at camp. Fuckers.